The Eye of the Beholder
About a week ago I saw a lady who is well-known enough around the Philly scene to be classified as a local celebrity. One of the things she is known for is her beauty. If you mention her name around a group of men who know of her, many of them will get a far-off, glazed look in their eyes. She is a very pretty lady and she has a very uncommon look which makes her stand out. When I saw her last week, the clothes she was wearing revealed a blemish that I had never noticed before. At the time I thought something similar to “Eww! That’s weird looking!”
That came back to mind today and I realized, that guy who was with her probably does not think that! I still think it was nasty looking, but it is a beautiful thing that she found someone who doesn’t. (Assuming things are right in their relationship) she found someone who sees her beauty despite the imperfections and the flaws that may at times hide, distort or alter it. Someone I know once said “Everyone has issues, you just have to find someone whose issues you can deal with.” Those are some of the truest words ever spoken.
I know what it’s like to be on both sides of that. I know how it feels to be a flawed person and be accepted despite that. It’s one thing to care about someone, but there’s nothing like that moment when you realize “Damn, she saw that and she still likes me?” It’s ironic, sometimes having someone accept your imperfections can make you want to fix them more than getting criticized for them. You find yourself wanting to be more patient, kinder, more organized, healthier, etc.
I know how it feels to have someone thank you for tolerating their faults and to find that gratitude to be absolutely silly. “Yes, I see your flaws, but why are you thanking me when you are perfect?” She never seems to understand. It’s not even that flaws make a person more human or more approachable. It’s that they are a part of the person. You accept the good, you accept the bad and it all becomes something wonderful.
I guess beauty must really be in the eye of the beholder.
